shardbond | Party Rock Anthem only it's played on kazoos

Party Rock Anthem only it's played on kazoos

[Oscar is a practiced master at Coping (tm) in the face of things he would prefer not to address in any sort of healthy or rational manner. After the events of yesterday, he's somehow getting the feeling that he isn't the only one, which means that in his mind there is only one thing to do: this translates to yet another Walmart booze heist (even larger than the original), a few side trips to amass snacks because RIP his kitchen, and some haphazardly erected decorations in one of the spare rooms to try to at least give off something of a celebratory atmosphere... but let's be real here, this is just Misery x CPR x Reese's Puffs + alcohol.

Sunday morning will find handwritten notes tucked under everyone's doors inviting them to a party that evening, snacks and drinks (that particular word underlined a couple of times, just in case people didn't pick up on the meaning of "party") provided gratis.

There's alcohol, there's soda for the minors, there's plenty of junk food to eat, and there are a whole bunch of other people who are also Going Through It. What better recipe for a party could you ask for?

... don't answer that.]

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Me? You have done far more for me than I have for you! And you certainly deserve far better!

[What has Turo done for More that was particularly special? He killed the impostor - but, then, More did the same for him in turn! Meanwhile, More's doing things like venturing into his mindscape? Come now!]

You always know the words I wish to hear the most. When I am losing myself, it is your hand that pulls me back. Recovering my memories might have crushed me, if it had not been for you continuing to give me direction. You are so alike to myself that I feel wholly understood, but still so unlike myself that your unsullied kindness keeps pulling me along.

I feel so safe with you that it shames me. After all I have done, all I have wrought, should I really have a right to stand here beside you? Yet I greedily keep pursuing you--!!

Your life should be your own to live, my friend. Even as I find myself holding onto you like a man drowning, I know that my burdens are not yours to carry.

[ ... the worst part of this barrage of words is that it comes out all in one go, unstoppable. ]

Of course you have a right!

[Where is all of this coming from? Turo's heard More talk about guilt and shame before, but never related to him. Has he been doing something wrong?]

If you are responsible for all of that, then I would be responsible for everything he did, wouldn't I? You are the one who is always trying to help me with all of that nonsense! I know you cannot possibly enjoy making so many visits to some sort of....hallucinatory Zero Lab. You have so often been the only thing that seems real to me at all. But - you have your own life to live, too! You should be out there living it, not constantly performing maintenance on a broken machine.

[ And there he goes again, saying right what More wants to hear the most. How he'd love to not be responsible, to fully disconnect himself from the man he's been split off from! More can believe it equally as little as Turo believed him down in the lab, but it's soothing to hear. It's exactly why he wants to cling to Turo so badly that he makes himself feel sick with it. When he'd been confined in Akademeia he could justify his own clinginess with his isolation, but now that he walks among people he has to confront that it's become a part of himself that's taken much deeper root.

It makes him want to grasp onto Turo like a child, and it makes him want tear off his own hands and cut Turo loose, set him free.

It's a spiral that seems unbreakable until the words 'broken machine' bring everything to a screeching halt. ]

[ Trying to accept his own worth is difficult, had made him want to look anywhere but at his friend, too ashamed of his own sentiments to face him properly.

This makes him look Turo straight in the eyes. ]

I have never thought of you as broken, not even once.

[ Inhale. Exhale. Okay, he's got this, even with his blood rushing in his ears and his head spinning from drink and feelings alike. ]

And nothing I have ever done for or with you can be described with a term so simple as 'maintenance'.

Whatever he thinks he built you for is of no consequence to me, or to anybody here. Whatever troubles continue to ail you merely mark you as a feeling individual, troubled as all beings are.

And certainly, the physical reality is that you are a machine. But this does not make you lesser. To me, the differences in our ways of being are a delight, a beautiful case of study, an adventure to embark on.

Please do not think that I have offered you friendship despite your robotic nature. I'm here with you because you are as you are, in full.

Edited 2025-02-25 12:52 (UTC)

[Turo, in turn, can't hold More's gaze while he's saying such things. He looks at the floor instead, grimacing at the sight of himself as he processes it again. It's like picking out this outfit was a harbinger of disaster.

Not that what More is saying now is disastrous. It's kind, kinder than Turo truly believes he deserves. At least it isn't anything crazy. Like - earlier, or - ]

That's. Very kind of you. You have always been very kind to me. I know that this is...recurring, again and again. I cannot seem to move past it.

[More's hardly the only person to say such things to him. Everyone here seems to think more or less the same way about it, even the people Turo has barely spoken with. But Turo knows what's going on inside him. If they could really see...

More has, though. More and Void Archives, but Void Archives is not the one trying to...confess? Surely not - well, whatever this is, the idea of them doing it is absurd. Is it...less so, with More...? It felt like it came out of nowhere, but if Turo replaces him with anyone else in the same scenario, that is much stranger. So, perhaps not utterly out of nowhere...]

I think...there is so much more out there. We have seen it, but we have not really been able to go and explore it freely. Even if we are no longer prisoners, we have still not had that liberty. There are going to be other and better people.

[There's certainly some here as well, but Turo doesn't want to...campaign for More to have feelings for someone else in particular out of this group? Feels weird. Certainly not his place.]

[ The lingering feeling that he's gone way too far won't leave More. Pushed by the atmosphere to admitting something a little too serious for the nature of the game. All his compliments to everyone here have been wholly genuine - there are many attractive people here, many he would consider spending a night with. But when he rated Turo highest of all, it wasn't the same kind of frivolous interest. It had been camouflaging itself as... a passing idea, a curiosity, but there was a deeper sentiment behind it, something else he'd been skirting around.

And maybe now that he's already gone and broken everything wide open, it's time to stop being a coward. ]

... I was going to ask you to travel with me, after all this is over.

[ It's harder to admit than a mere stupid numerical rating of attractiveness. And that's the crux of the issue, really - casually indicating romantic curiosity towards a man you already wanted to stay with was maybe not the brightest idea he ever had. ]

I almost did ask you, quite a few times.

[ But he felt Turo should not be burdened with him. And he was afraid of rejection. Still is. ]

It's my sincere desire, and it is not conditional. None of the foolish notions I have put between us are of any concern.

Oh.

[Turo can't deny that he's considered the idea himself. But never too closely. He certainly never would have asked. Even after he learned that More did not have anything to return for, did not even plan to return to his home world - who was he to ask such a thing?]

I - I would like that very much. I have been...afraid, of what is to happen after this. Not because of the power situation.

[That's a factor, but more than that - where would he go? What would he do? If he set out alone again, would he ever find someone else to stay or travel with? Turo has always had a sinking feeling that it wouldn't be the case, that his own awkwardness and oddities and...well, nerves would prevent him from making friends once he was no longer literally forced to live and fight alongside others like he's been here. And what of the people he does know here? Would he ever see them again?]

[ There's an anxious moment in which More feels like he's waiting for the other shoe to drop - for Turo to find some reason to refuse him, whether that be a sudden sobering on More's nature or just another bout of humility making him find reasons for this to be inappropriate in some form.

And then nothing comes and More practically lights up. ]

I admit, I am also anxious... What roads await us? What purpose will we find by walking them? It is impossible to tell before we step out. But... with you by my side, I believe I can do it. I can believe in something wonderful, just out of sight for us to find.

That - that sounds truly marvelous!

[Turo smiles, a little helplessly. He's...happy? All at once, the future does not seem like such a vast and terrifying place. That feeling is almost a little frightening in and of itself. It does not seem like something that ought to belong to him.]

We could go anywhere we wanted. The entire multiverse...it's a little staggering, isn't it?

[ Relief is a beautiful feeling. From one moment to another, the storm clouds in More's mind seem to life and he can think clearly again. ]

Quite so! Even narrowing down our possibilities feels like a rather daunting task! I believe we can come up with a few preferences between the two of us, but that would still leave us basically limitless!

[Turo's smile broadens, simply at the phrase "our possibilities". It’s the two of them, together, choosing. He had imagined having to do it alone, a prospect that indeed felt daunting, but now it’s starting to seem far more manageable.]

I suppose we'll see how it all comes out. Maybe something will present itself.

[ Thank the heavens that Turo is smiling again. Every moment of agonizing embarrassment was worth it, if it could finally give them a perspective for the future that was so sorely needed by both of them. ]

We'd surely like somewhere scenic, technologically advanced just in case of repairs, diverse so my horns don't alarm anyone... Ah, but you're right. Better not to count our chickens before they are hatched.

[ It's easy to get excited though. ]

Oh, yes, I suppose.

[He's the one who brought it up! He's still thinking about it though! The idea of not having Pokemon around is a little sad, but his own world doesn't fit any of the criteria. Maybe there's one that's just variant enough to work...?]

I don't know of a world like that off-hand. We'd have to scout around.

Yes, maybe we should begin with asking the others some more detailed questions.

[ There's way more worlds than just the ones everyone else is from, but it's a starting point.

... and while More said to stop getting specific, he himself can't help that he keeps ruminating, so he adds: ]

Actually, my horns are not impossible to hide... or explain away as costume... or even remove, but I'd much like to avoid something so terribly painful.

Oh, no, you should not do that!

[If settling on a world would involve More mutilating himself, it clearly isn't the correct world! Though explaining it away as a costume piece is possible. That might even pass muster in Paldea; he'd probably be considered eccentric, but a lot of trainers are.]

Do they have feeling?

[ More nods, inclining his head a little for a better view of horn texture. ]

They do. Though they aren't as sensitive as skin, so I wouldn't feel a breeze of air on my horns, but touch? It all registers easily.

[He lifts his chin to peer at the horns, pupils contracting a little mechanically as he zooms in. He wonders what they'd feel like to touch.]

That varies widely across Pokemon with similar structures, so I didn't wish to assume. But yes - at least in my world, you could have gotten away with calling them some sort of costume piece. People would probably just think you were a dedicated dragon tamer or something like that.

Horn structure varies a little depending on your heritage, even among clemar.

And there are animals with similar horns as well. I'd liken my horns more to an ox's than a dragon's, though.

Oh, there aren't really any dragon-type Pokemon with horns at all! It's just a common affectation among dragon tamers. I suppose it goes well with dragon's teeth - a number of species regularly regrow them, so those are highly prized accessories.

There aren't? That's peculiar!

All dragons I have seen depictions of, or in one rare case actually studied, had some amount of horn-like growth.

[ The more abstract types like fairy, dragon, ghost and so on still give him a bit of trouble to wrap his mind around generally, so he's caught off-guard at the lack of visual similarity. ]

It's spines, primarily, or tusks! Haxorus has two prominent crescent-shaped tusks growing out of the side of their jaws - [He indicates the shape and size with his hands.] - that they use in fighting, but most other dragons prefer breath attacks, teeth, or claws.

Fascinating! Just like with fairies, it appears that your dragons are quite different from what I would consider a dragon. To start with, the dragons of my world are not primarily physical beings.

While they can manifest bodies out of magla, their purest form is 'in storage' so to speak, confined into objects.

[ It's nice to know this for sure now - sometimes memory regains are also useful for nerd knowledge... ]

Oh! Yes, that's certainly very different! Dragons are very much physical creatures, though there are one or two that are also ghost-types. Dragapult are fairly solid as ghosts go, for the most part, but the other...that is a singular creature. Giratina. It lives in something very like the void, a place outside of our ordinary world.

That... sounds extremely intriguing!

[ If they go to a world with Pokémon, he's going to be so hung up on legendaries, do not let him. ]

It sounds like a genuine deity. In our world, the mustari revere a dragon as their god, but... With my full knowledge restored, I now have reason to believe that dragons are, above all, ancient weapons. A rather unromantic and unfortunate conclusion to have to draw.

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